MY REEL WENT VIRAL

MY REEL WENT VIRAL: The Content Creator Mindset

A couple weeks ago one of my Instagram reels went viral on BrightCardboardLife. I shared it with my 300 Instagram followers and a week later I had approximately 260,000 views and around 22 thousand likes. Today it sits around 350,000 views and continues to grow. For a nano Instagram account, that reel is definitely on the viral track.

Since I went viral back in 2011 on a super small YouTube account, I asked Gemini what are the chances of going viral again in June 2026? I was surprised to find out that going viral (especially for small accounts) is quite rare. The chances of going viral twice on two different platforms is 1 chance in 160 million.

GOING VIRAL A SECOND TIME made me want to dig deeper into the digital creator spaces and the mechanics and metrics of these platforms. I wanted to learn as much as I could. Here are a few thoughts that I distilled—albeit roughly—after some of my research.

1.Even though the social media and content creator space appears to be saturated, always remember this: it is always going to be easier to scroll and do nothing than to create digital content. This has been my mantra for years.

2. Coming up with your own ideas, executing them until you reach a “physical thing” or an output is going to be more of a hurdle than picking up your phone and scrolling through social media, listening to your favorite YouTube podcast or simply reposting someone else’s meme, reel or political rant. This means people who consistently create than consume will always have the upper hand.

3. There are two major psychological factors at play for a digital content creator: The FIRST psychological hurdle is this: There is the stigma or “negative perception” about digital content creation—especially by people whom you interact with in everyday life. These are the people who lurk or find out about your content.

These people think digital content creation “isn’t really work” and so they undervalue it and disrespect anyone struggling to create content who hasn’t “Made it yet”. For the bigger accounts they chalk those up to “Well, they have a big account and they know what they are doing” etc. Or, they say “Well they’re professionals and they’re making money, so that’s different.”

The SECOND psychological hurdle is this: Most people are WAY too embarrassed, fragile and vulnerable to be a social media content creator. First, you have those friends and family who are actively discouraging you and gossiping behind your back as you make your efforts. Even more, you have strangers who, in the comment section, will publicly humiliate your own digital creations—your reels, photos, text or blog posts or any ORIGINAL digital media YOU produce.

4. But here are some very interesting facts you should consider:

Facebook is largely considered an “empty room” by many people. We see it as dead. Nobody goes there anymore, right? All our close friends BARELY POST ANYMOE and when they do, they repost someone else’s text post (copy pasta) reel, article or goofy picture

The surprising truth is that while it appears that Facebook is largely a ghost town, the statistics reveal that it is STILL A HEAVILY USED PLATFORM. The same number of people are still passively scrolling but FEWER PEOPLE ARE USING THIS PLATFORM TO POST.

Do you know what this means? It means that you can CAPITALIZE on the SECRET LURKER PHENOMENON that is going on behind the scenes. As I type these words, I want you to:

Spend less than 1% of your time checking your views or follower numbers. These numbers fluctuate.

Spend 99% of your time creating, curating and adjusting your content. Keep trying variations to see what works best for you. Try reels, photos, solid backgrounds with text, intriguing quotes, photos with BOLD WORDS to freeze the scroll.

Be fearless to post. You know why? I can guarantee that almost everyone is scrolling by so fast by mine (and your) posts almost instantly. The statistics reveal that most content is swiped by in 1.5 to 3 seconds—and 3 seconds is long these days. The hardest part is getting someone to idle on your piece of digital content for more than 4 seconds.

Always come up with original ideas; post your own impressions of the world around you—whether it be your children, your home/yard, a block of text about an idea you were thinking about…how you’re adapting to a new diet. THE LIST IS ENDLESS. Just make sure it is coming from YOU and you are offering your own “Take on it”. The common theme is YOUR OWN ORIGINAL THOUGHTS/PICTURES/VIDEOS/CONTENT.

STOP REPOSTING OTHER PEOPLE’S CONTENT ON YOUR PUBLIC ACCOUNT. If you want to grow on any social media platform these days, your content must be traced back to your own mind. Meta (the parent company who owns Facebook and Instagram) actively suppresses reposting other people’s text blurbs (copypasta), articles, reels, political articles or funny memes. Meta marks you as a REPOSTER. In other words, you get flagged by the system as not generating your own original content and only a very small group of people (if any) will ever see your posts. Your chances for growth are stagnated.

Making content is hit or miss. Some will resonate with people and do well in views and shares. Other pieces of content will fizzle out quickly. Just remember that this is true for any digital creator, even the most successful ones.

Be consistent with your digital content production. Remember you are creating a digital asset that will serve as future digital real estate. Digital assets can be leveraged for advertising, or creating a funnel towards other things that you might be selling. Pushing traffic towards an underlying business, book or piece of artwork is sometimes the ultimate strategy. BUT YOU MUST BUILD A DIGITAL ASSET FIRST TO GET ANY TRAFFIC AT ALL. Do you get how this works?

Do not worry as much about follower numbers as you are about organic views and traffic. You want your content to reach engaged viewers. If the data reveal few views—even your own followers are unlikely to be interested in your content and the algorithm will give you a bad score for your account or at least for the next posts.

The 2026 Algorithm focuses on raw, unpolished content. This content is vulnerable. It can seem embarrassing or humiliating. The EMBARRASMENT TAX happens to anyone who is actively building digital content in the face of judgmental onlookers.

BROOKE RAYBOULD AND THE MOM INFLUENCER WEALTH STRATEGY: MY THOUGHTS

HOW INFLUENCERS LIKE BROOKE RAYBOULD THINK ABOUT THE INTERNET

When I think about extracting wealth from everyday situations—from what you already have on hand, I think of Mom influencers like Brooke Raybould.

She was recommended to me in 2021 because of her location at the time. She was living in Virginia and we live in West Virginia. She posted lots of content related to her day-to-day life of raising 3 boys (she now has 5). She would showcase her morning routine, waking up at 5am, cold showers, journaling and lots of prep before her boys woke up. She was into fitness, exercise and healthy food. I appreciated her emphasis on hard work and self discipline.

I really enjoyed her crisp, professional content. It was highly digestible but somehow motivating. What? A mom just discussing her life on the internet and she was getting popular and likely making cash from advertisers and/or affiliate marketers? She would discuss Andrew Huberman—someone I was already listening to and learning from. It made me think—wow, I could be her! I already do most of what she is parroting and I have 3 young kids too! It kind of gave me hope as a stay-at-home Mom who only works 2 days each week.

Because she had such “Big Picture” thinking, she had a vision for herself and her family.

She found a way to tap into the digital space. You could tell her mind was whirling—how can I extract money from all of these Moms—not to mention lurkers, passive scrollers, gawkers and from the “This is cringe content” folks? These are the same people who have ZERO energy to use on their own content output but somehow have loads of time to scroll, offer lengthy detailed opinions, and basically sit back and judge a successful enterprise on a day-to-day basis.

Brooke could see that so many people were simply using the internet as a passive, click and scroll place—not as a place for wealth growth. She could see people clicking on her pretty pictures and cute videos of her boys. All she needed to do was create and cultivate her “Mom Brand” so to speak, and voila—even more cash pouring in as advertisers and marketers took notice!

There are psychological elements of comparison that Mom influencers unintentionally (or intentionally) tap into. Because humans are basically hardwired to compare, an influencer like Brooke Raybould can trigger this and gain a huge audience as well as advertisers and affiliate endorsement deals.

She writes her own Disney Family Guides and offers other courses. She is also in the throes of a book deal right now (2026) because she can use her big influence to sell more copies of her book to her followers first and then this pushes her book up in search for non-Followers and just regular readers of self-help books. Who knows, because of her 1.3 million following on Instagram, her self-help book could become a New York Times Best seller.

The reason I think I’m especially intrigued by Brooke as a sensational, money-making Mom influencer, is because I had a time in 2011 where I suddenly started to make money by posting videos on YouTube.

At the time I honestly HAD NO IDEA that I could make money posting YouTube videos—let alone hundreds of dollars each month! Once I started making money on YouTube, I saw the entire internet differently. It was motivating to make YouTube videos because I was paid for it! I received endless negativity, anxiety-riddling discomfort and the DISLIKE BAR was huge then!

Amidst all criticism, Brooke Raybould has certainly discovered this same secret that I discovered. While we all tacitly know they get $$$ we don’t discuss it enough. We almost act as if they are just “doing it for fun” or “as a hobby” when we go onto Instagram and are confronted with their content. It’s there. It seems harmless, so we “dwell” for a bit. Dwell time is the most CRUCIAL METRIC in the META 2026 Algorithm.

Some of us don’t mind the realization because we are often mindless in how we eat as well as how we use our time. Brooke Raybould is INSANELY motivated by the underlying dynamics of the internet (and by human nature). She knows how to extract resources there. She jumped into her entrepreneurial suit in full force. While people laugh at how she “displays her children for all to see” she is laughing all the way to the bank.

Mom influencers AND THE MOM/FAMILY NICHE ARE THE MOST LUCRATIVE CATEGORY ON THE INTERNET RIGHT NOW BECAUSE THE MAJORITY OF HOUSEHOLD PURCHASES ARE DONE BY MOMS. 2026

But if we could realize how precious time was, wouldn’t we just be focusing on creating our own content on a regular basis? Someone like Brooke WOULD NOT BE SUCCESSFUL if every single person was busily creating their own content and diving deeper into their blog writing, posting their own unique carousels, pictures or reels on Instagram or thinking of well-written, thoughtful blurbs on their Facebook page. All of these have the ability to gain traction, but they require consistency and emotional regulation (because you won’t grow fast and it can be a struggle before your account experiences the “Snow Ball” effect).

When your time and energy is used on the act of creation, it takes time away from scrolling. I can guarantee large content creators spend little if any time on the content of others.

That’s right, your time and attention is basically paying for these big influencers. They are making money from how you use your time.

Here’s the thing about Brooke Raybould, she discovered early on how much her time online could be worth if she used it to “CREATE HERSELF” instead of use it to consume media. This is the deepest realization that we all know but refuse to admit in our own lives. Meanwhile, we all still seem to want to get rich.

Even though the social media and content creator space appears to be saturated, always remember this: it is always going to be easier to scroll and do nothing than to create content.

Coming up with your own ideas, executing them until you reach a “physical thing”—an output, is going to be more of a hurdle. There’s just more friction involved. Brooke Raybould becoming her own “MOM BRAND” was a tough hurdle. She worked hard with her content. She continually thought of unique ways to use herself, her kids and her everyday life as a means to “keep people dwelling on the internet” and to keep advertises or affiliate marketing businesses interested. She has gorgeous blue eyes. Her children are adorable and well-mannered. She has a beautiful house in Texas. All of these things are crucial to her success, but she still has to put the work into making regular digital content and USING HER EXISTING MATERIALS.

It’s just easier to pick up your phone and scroll through what’s already out there. Ready-to-click on podcasts will always be easier to listen to. Facebook will always be ready for a quick scroll.

Because of the work required to create social media content and BECAUSE OF BOTH THE STIGMA OF BEING A CONTENT CREATOR and the common (negative perception) that creating social media is “nothing” or “isn’t working” or “isn’t actually a job”, THERE WILL ALWAYS BE SOME KIND OF SPACE FOR CONTENT CREATORS. It still requires some degree of effort to keep people on the platform and to keep them engaged.

There are still too many people on the planet who are embarrassed to put themselves out there and make mistakes, expose their ideas and content to judging family and friends (who love to gossip about your content behind your back) or give you those quiet looks of calm rejection when they encounter you in person.

You have to sit and think about why you desire wealth so much. Is it for status? Do you wish to project to others that you have finally made it—you’ve leveraged your skills and your existence to create something from nothing? Do you have specific interests that you would like to fully pursue and these require a higher income? Perhaps you have personal debt or even family members who need financial assistance.

Do you have an innate, personal need to see yourself as someone who has finally understood the BIG PICTURE regarding a situation, system or idea that now you can capitalize on? Because you see it from a macroscopic perspective you can find a unique path to extract resources from it. You know how it works and why it works. You know the underlying structure. You know what causes what in this system. Your mind finds a unique angle where it can gain value…and then you sell that value to others in new ways.

My prediction is that the digital market space will possibly be the biggest market space of the future. Influencers are jumping in on this cultural paradigm now and getting their “real estate” while costs are low and distribution (I think of it more as visibility) is still relatively high. It’s not a hobby. It’s a way for anyone with a creative mind-set to make money.

MY FIRST SUNO SONG I RELEASED ON SPOTIFY

I have officially launched my very first piece of music on Spotify!https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=8UQp_DnTkWs&si=KOmmyToP73qDvw0p

If you click the link above you can hear my first song on Youtube music. If you click this link, you can hear on Spotify:https://open.spotify.com/album/5MvWjh4z5MXpBcrk47u1d0?si=19c596054c4c49a5

But let me tell you first some more details.

I am excited to enter the music space (like everyone else on the planet) and experiment with different sonic textures.

As a (very small) content creator on Instagram and Facebook, I constantly deal with the potential threat of violations from using other artists’ music over my reels. This pushed me to look for other options. I wanted sounds and musical overlays that represented the specific pieces of digital content I was producing. I also wanted music that I could claim was MY OWN.

I realize Distrokid and Spotify are HUGE right now and becoming quite saturated. 100 THOUSAND SONGS ARE UPLOADED ONTO SPOTIFY EACH DAY AND MOST WON’T RECEIVE A SINGLE PLAY. Despite these disheartening facts, I wanted to plunge in and experiment and not worry about the numbers or my success.

I grew up around Christian music. So basically, until I turned 15, I was listening to exclusively Christian Gospel music on the radio. Think Michael Card, Steve Green, Sandi Patty, Ray Boltz, Steven Curtis Chapman..Twila Paris. The list goes on.

I was listening to the choir at church and singing Gospel hymns as a child. My entire childhood connection and experience with music was from church and Christian radio. Thus, I decided to make my first musical release on Spotify– something in the Gospel genre.

I had been toying around with the idea of “A Tale of Two Gardens” for several months. One night my husband and I found ourselves deeply immersed in a discussion regarding the literary symbolism—the symmetry—between the two gardens in the Bible; the Garden of Eden and The Garden of Gethsemane. We were astounded by the similarities. We started to research them. My ideas and lyrics for this song came from that discussion.

I decided to co-engineer this Gospel/Christian musical piece on Suno, the music generator that EVERYONE IS USING RIGHT NOW. I used these lyrics and all the ideas my husband and I had in that conversation.

Easter is coming soon and this song highlights the Easter story. For some it will be literal and for others It is symbolic. It is about renewal, transformation. It is about how new life (spring) comes out of a period of death (winter). It is the new season of hope. Some will find intriguing similarities between the seasons and the Christian Easter story. Some will find similarities between the Garden of Eden and The Garden of Gethsemane.

It would be wonderful if you could click on these links and help the algorithm promote my new Easter song on Spotify. My song is called “A Tale of Two Gardens”. https://open.spotify.com/album/5MvWjh4z5MXpBcrk47u1d0?si=19c596054c4c49a5

$$$ WHY BOREDOM CAN BE VERY GOOD

For me I define boredom like this: It’s when you must be fully engaged and present and actively working on a project…AND it is always a monotonous one, one that you must FORCE yourself through.

Working at a pre-K twice each week has really shown me what boredom is. You have to be engaged in the scheduled activities of the two-year olds. You’re going through all the motions and unlike an arduous hike where you get to view the gorgeous scenery at the summit, or a workout where you feel the biological surge of blood flow and adrenaline as well as the knowledge that you’re actively improving your physique and making a difference in your health, working with two year olds you feel like you’re just keeping them in the right place. Your attention isn’t free to wander; it is consumed by each child’s every second impulse to throw something or to escape. Also, you’re not really getting to see the progress that they’re making because they won’t be with you next year and they’re someone else’s children.

Lately I have become fascinated by whether boredom can have an impact on motivation levels. Could it help develop the right mental framework for experiencing the dopamine drive, the feeling to engage in a task and to enjoy doing it? Could it bring about new ideas?

I am actively trying to lean into boredom. I want these moments of boredom to fill my days so that I can be more creative and come up with a variety of useful and novel ideas. I’m using boredom as a tool to ultimately sharpen my senses and my experiences.

Just as buying more lottery tickets increases your chances of winning, more ideas increase your ability to generate more ideas from your subconscious. These are the kinds of ideas that can be streamed into the pipeline of your awareness. The more of these you have, the more likely you are to come up with an original synthesis. This could be an invention, business idea, or a strategy to do something that no one has ever thought of before.

It’s absolutely fascinating to consider that all the raw materials of the universe surround you on a moment-to-moment basis. But these must be extracted from the chaos; they must be rearranged. You can come up with something out of the drudgery of your own life and produce an original idea.

Let’s pivot back to boredom. The more I learn the more I see that punctuating your day with 20 minutes of monotonous boredom is a recipe…a conduit to having divergent thinking. Only then can you piece the strange or unseemingly disconnected thoughts together.

It’s the fusion of ideas that we desire. Often, it’s a problem that requires a solution.

Say, you don’t like the way your house looks. Or, you don’t know how to attract more followers to your Instagram account. Maybe you really want to figure out a way to develop a line of interesting home decor items that reflect your aesthetics, your artistic tastes and personality. Perhaps you want to figure out a way to make more friendships and more personal connections in your day-to-day life.

One of the interesting things about our brains is that when we are truly bored, when we’re going through repetitive thoughts our brains default mode network activates. This is considered the opposite of executive function. If executive function is when your brain is engaged in a complex and detailed thinking, the default mode network is when you’re NOT attempting complex or detailed thinking…you’re not doing high level math or constructing elevated literary prose. These require lots of conscious effort. They need the management of your attention so you can retrieve information from your memory to compose or create something or understand something.

How do you know when the default mode network turns on? The best way to know is if you suddenly hear the voice within your head. You hear not just the ruminating thoughts about “what you should have said” or “why did she say that to me?” but you hear things like, “Maybe I should turn one of my living room walls into a “Butterfly Wall” with lots of pictures of butterflies.

In other words, when the default mode network arrives, random ideas start coming. Ideas that may or may not be useful. You will notice that they start to flutter through. They are allowed through the gate because you have deactivated the main executive controller—the pre-frontal cortex. You’re doing mindless tasks like folding laundry, going for a walk, taking a shower, or washing dishes. A new idea comes at you. You think, ahh, maybe I should try that…maybe I should research that phenomenon? Maybe I should write about that phenomenon! When these kinds of thoughts start coming, you know you are in the default mode network.

When you’ve finally arrived (and ANY music, listening to podcasts or beeps from your phone will not help you get there as quickly) you need to know that this is where interesting connections between ideas are made. This is where the real MONEY-MAKING CONCEPTS HAPPEN.

Different things that your subconscious may have picked up at different times of the day or days ago or even weeks ago may spontaneously bubble up and combine to make a very wonderful idea. This is where inventions happen. This is where powerful plots to movies break out, where two pieces of disparate data reproduce a new concept. Sometimes these concepts are quite useful. They may help resolve in earlier conflict period you have been dealing with.

New approaches, new inventions, new paintings, new business plans, new plots to novels or plays or gardening landscapes develop in this state. They make themselves tangible to your conscious state brain.

This is exactly why periods of boredom, monotony, and stillness end up giving you such a wildly incredible edge. But it makes total sense! You can’t understand brightness without the dark, and you can’t see the bright ideas without the simultaneous background of monotony…your own feelings and experiences of deep boredom. Yes, going through repetitive motions will get you there.

It is a literal fact that your brain will start to conjure up its’ own unique creations if you let yourself step into boredom and monotony on a regular basis. You need this kind of “contrast state” to push your brain to rearranging and re-managing itself as it works with less stimulation.

I can attest to these many times over the course of my life. The times where I really allowed boredom to prevail, the more likely my brain could reconfigure itself, bring up storage boxes from the basement, so to speak. More storage boxes to look through? More stuff for it to work with!

CULTIVATING CREATIVITY WITH THINKING

The problem with creativity is that it requires effort. You must wrestle with an idea enough to want to see it “produced”.

I’ve always admired creative individuals and the act of creativity itself. But I know it requires that the mind burn and churn out ideas. And many of these ideas won’t work. Many are impractical.

This process is expensive from a mental perspective. One must go down the creative path and to think those first thoughts…. to ask those first questions…. and then bump their brains against many ideas that are ALREADY OUT THERE, that already exist. Now you must find a unique path in this swirl of chaos.

I think the problem with creativity is that we think this is a state where only the most gifted or innately talented or privileged can enter. The truth is that the act of creativity requires a long, almost exhausting trail of trials and efforts before any product is invented, masterpiece is painted, or exotic piece of furniture is crafted…before any Olympian wins a gold medal.

Remember these are efforts of the mind that one is literally bringing out into tangible reality. It is a mistake of our push-button “everything this instant” culture to think that the artifacts of creativity are also push-of-the -button.

A quilt, a symphony or a successful home goods operation like Anthropolpogie were made by individuals who were and are truly moved and inspired by the act of creating…THE PROCESS of making.

It’s the hundreds upon hundreds of incremental steps that are neglected by ALL outside spectators. All The risks and the monotonous efforts, all the trials and embarrassments, all the “looking foolish” or “looking like a show off” or the mind-numbingly boring experiences are felt in FULL FORCE by the individual who tries to make the creative effort.

The 2026 Olympics are almost here and I’m reminded of the 1990’s and early 2000’s.To become one of the world’s top Figure skaters and Olympians, Michelle Kwan began skating at age 5. At age 8, she started waking up at 4:00 AM and heading to the rink at 5:00 to skate for 2 hours before heading to a full day of elementary school. After school she was back at the rink for two more hours of practice. The amount of effort was insane, yet most of us just think of her as immensely talented.

One of the biggest thoughts that I find sabotaging my own efforts is the idea that “Hey, all of this creative effort may go in vain”. The consideration that all these efforts might not be the result of anything majestic or lasting or even anything briefly captivating.

As Quest Protein Bar billionaire Tom Bilyeu (who grew up in a lower middle-class home) says “The struggle is guaranteed but the success is not”. And that’s the nature of the game.

By putting out efforts you’re investing not so much in the lottery but in the stock market. The stock market is a more reliable means to wealth acquisition, yet still risky. You can wait to be lucky and “in shape” or you can start making incremental moves now. And, when I say incremental, I mean small moves in your thinking. Just your thoughts will do for now. Training your thoughts to keep going towards your goals is often the first best form of training.

Say to yourself something like this, “I know I’m imperfect, but I have achieved X goal in the past”. Reflect on the little accomplishments you have completed by yourself through your own efforts.

The next thing you must do is try to notice any slightly negative thoughts you have about yourself. You will notice how constantly an effortlessly it is to think badly about yourself. The steady drip, drip, drip of negativity about yourself OR YOUR PAST or your current lack of success isn’t helpful towards what you want to achieve.

If you can effortlessly think negatively about yourself, think about changing that mindset to think effortlessly positively about yourself. True, both scenarios may be slightly delusional…but I think you can guess which thought is more helpful than the other.

Training your continual act of thinking and imagination will be the most important step you can take at the beginning of this creative process.

Thinking About The FLOW STATE

I want to crack the code on flow. I want the sense of feeling phenomenally enraptured and overtaken by the experience at hand and the simultaneous useful connections that I am generating.

I desire the feeling that I am being productive but enjoying it thoroughly.

You can enjoy something to an extent, and it is not useful or productive. You can do something productive and it not be rapturous, enjoyable or even bearable.

We all desire the collision of both; a delightful, immersive undertaking that is also useful. We want something that can be a stepping- stone to some other potential operation or action. In the end, we don’t want to waste our time in either boredom or mindless indulgence.

It is important to realize that flow states are free for the taking.

A mindset of abundance realizes that flow states must be accessible at least several times a day. Consider Buddhist monks. They live in a meditative and contemplative states. Research suggests that monks can get into a state of absorption—a cousin to flow—several times a day.

One of the well attested ways to get into a flow state is by picking out an object and looking at it closely. Visually inspect the object and look at all its features. You want to pick out several aspects of it that are general themes, like color and shape.

Next you guide your attention to other aspects of it. You might zoom into tinier details like the intricate pattern impressed upon it. You might consider the overall texture and then gaze deeper into this object and consider how lumpy it is. Perhaps there is a scratch mark or imperfection. You may also look at how this object sits next to other objects. Consider its position in space, does it invoke a sense of beauty? Does it seem oddly placed?

Think about the original creation of this object, was it made in a factory with a machine or was it a human hand that made it? Have you considered the entire process Involved in making this object? How was it formulated and then brought to the market? Think about the entire chain of events.

The entire point of this exercise is to flagellate your mind with all the details of the object so that you merge into it. You want to push out the part of your mind that thinks of self by fully deleting the self in the process. Even as I try to formulate these words, I find myself diving deeper into the state of flow. As I do this, I find myself more engaged and more deeply committed to the enterprise of writing.

Flow does require effort and time because you must use time to commit yourself to this effort. You must diligently engage your attention all the way– you don’t want any extra attention left to ruminate on someone’s disparaging remark.

One of the most fascinating things I have learned about this mental state is that there is a definite link between physical pain reduction and entering into flow. Flow is an analgesic.

Recently I broke my left wrist while ice skating. I fractured my wrist in several places. The bone pain plus the stinging, throbbing pain from the incision (where a metal plate was installed) is so intense I can hardly think, create or engage with life. Two Norco pills are not assuaging the intensity today.

What I am learning is that getting into a flow state is a great way to override or downregulate the thalamus–the relay station for sensory information in your brain. In other words, engaging in a challenging activity that nudges up to one’s learning ability is the perfect place to be for pain management.

I’m pursuing art and painting today. I’m going back and forth between sitting still resting my throbbing arm and then going back to painting with my dominant, right hand. The pain comes and goes but I do notice that as I come up with new ideas for the placement of color or the abstract arrangement of shapes on my canvas, I am taken away from my pain experience, even if momentarily.

HOW ISLAM IS LIKE CHRISTIANITY

Christians often distinguish themselves from Muslims by saying, “Islam is a religion of submission to rules, while Christianity is a relationship of love.”

However, when you press a devout Christian on what it actually means to be saved, the distinction collapses. If we look at the mechanics of both faiths—not the theology, but the required posture of the human—they appear to be the SAME PLAYBOOK.

Here is the case for why Fundamentalist Christianity is essentially “Islam with a different Savior.”

The “Demons Believe” Problem

The Christian Claim: “We are saved by Faith alone, not by works. Muslims strive to earn Allah’s favor; we receive Jesus’s favor freely.”

The Reality Check: Ask a fundamentalist: “Can I believe Jesus is God, believe He died for my sins, and believe He rose again… but still live my life exactly how I want, ignoring His commands?”

They will inevitably say No. They will quote James 2:19: “You believe that there is one God. Good! Even the demons believe that—and shudder.”

The Conclusion: If “demon belief” (intellectual agreement) doesn’t save you, what is the missing ingredient? It is LORDSHIP. It is making Jesus the Master of your life. Therefore, the price of admission isn’t just “belief”—it is Total Surrender.

In Arabic, the word Islam literally means “Submission.”

In Christianity, “making Jesus Lord” literally means “Submission.”

The “Slave” Identity

Both faiths consider the highest human honor to be the total abdication of autonomy.

Islam: The believer is called a slave/servant of Allah.
Christianity: The Apostle Paul, in the original Greek, constantly refers to himself as a doulos (Rom 1:1, Phil 1:1).
- Most modern Bibles soften this to “servant,” but the literal translation is “Bond-servant” or “Slave.”
- A doulos has no will of his own; he only does the will of the Master.

If Paul calls himself a “Slave of Christ” and a Muslim calls himself a “Slave of Allah,” why do you insist your system is about Freedom and theirs is about Bondage? Both systems demand the death of the “Self.”

Both Christianity and Islam look to Abraham as the father of the faith. What is Abraham’s defining moment in both Bibles and the Quran?

It wasn’t giving to the poor.
It wasn’t being kind to strangers.
It was his willingness to murder his own son (Isaac or Ishmael) because God told him to.

The Comparison:

The Muslim View: Abraham is the hero because he submitted (Islam) to Allah’s will, even when it defied human ethics.
The Christian View: Abraham is the hero because he feared God more than he loved his son.

In both religions, the definition of “The Ultimate Good” is the same: Obedience to Authority overrides Human Ethics. If God asks you to kill your son, the “Moral” act is to say “Yes, Lord.”

Christians cannot claim moral superiority over Islamic submission when their own “Father of Faith” is celebrated for the exact same act of blind obedience.

Christians argue: “But ours is a relationship! We obey because we love Him!” A “relationship” where one party holds the power of Eternal Torture over the other.

A “relationship” where one party holds the power of Eternal Torture over the other, and where the “love” is demonstrated by total obedience, has a name in the secular world. We don’t call that a partnership; we call it a Dictatorship.

If a Muslim obeys Allah to avoid Hell, and a Christian obeys Jesus to prove they are “truly saved” (and thus avoid Hell), the motivational structure is identical. The “Love” is indistinguishable from “Fear.”

If the only way to prove I am a ‘True Christian’ is to surrender my will, obey the commands, and call myself a slave to Christ… then Christianity isn’t the opposite of Islam. It is just a different dialect of the same language.

KEEP MENTAL NOTES

We keep being told “What gets measured gets managed”.

If you can see your waist whittling down, you can measure it to confirm a reduction in inches.

Likewise, if you think you’re getting more movement throughout the day and becoming less sedentary—you can measure the number of daily steps you’re getting with a Fit app on your phone.

When you get to experience and visualize the improvements in your various goals you have instituted for yourself, you get a mental reward.

You end up finding ways to implement measurement techniques into your life. Did you forego sugar for half the day? If you can’t track it somewhere JUST NOTICE IT. Keep a mental note. Always take moments to thank yourself and reward yourself with just the thought.

Do you have a social media account where you post regular photos or reels? You’re constantly tracking your success. You’re tracking your reach with the analytics on the platform you use. You’ll take note of comments, likes, views and subscriber numbers. As you look at the metrics and consider them, your brain is taking notice.

You end up gaining a sense of both inspiration and motivation when you see these improvements in your metrics.

We need to start realizing that health, mental health and self-improvement requires this metric or “analytic system” too.

One thing I want to emphasize is that you don’t necessarily need to jot it down or keep an orderly tab on a device. Instead, just think about it. Your brain is a computer too. Take mental pictures of your little successes. In other words, savor your success for a moment and give yourself credit.

The reason why this method is so undiscussed is because we have a million apps and a million programs and tools at our disposal to keep track of our progress.

But what if it was far simpler and far more accessible and much quicker just to give yourself constant reminders?

You probably give yourself mental reminders about “How out of shape you are” or “How you’re terribly inept at such and such”. It’s easy to deluge your brain with constant, negative mental reminders. Psychology tells us that we have a negativity bias. Our brains are wired to see the negative and the scary since our species developed on the African plains confronted by vicious beasts of all kinds. The human brain naturally wired itself from the beginning to be LEERY before CHEERY.

Perhaps we could turn this all around and start to slowly give ourselves little mental notes when we perform the task effectively or we do something correctly.

Even if just a small thing, just say “Okay, I did that one thing!” or “I lifted weights in the basement for 2 minutes.”. Or “I parked very far from the store entrance in order to get more steps in.” Maybe you just need to remind yourself “I don’t have a headache right now, that means I can focus on any task better.”

Take mental notes throughout the day. Your brain does notice this, it builds reserve for more productive future actions. There is a snowball effect that is occurring.

Just as Dave Ramsey has a method about paying off the small debts first to gain a sense of accomplishment to have the mental impetus to pay off the larger debts later, perhaps we need to NOTICE THE LITTLE ACCOMPLISHMENTS FIRST in order to have the mental ability to sustain ourselves as we work towards BIGGER accomplishments.

To Boil it down: Start small and don’t make it technical! Just take mental notes about the positive instances in your life. Your brain will take notice, even if subconsciously, and will push you into further positive actions.

PEOPLE TELL YOU NOT TO POST CONTROVERSIAL OR PROVACATIVE IDEAS ON FACEBOOK

This is something that I want you to remember: the next time someone tells you not to post a controversial or provocative Facebook post or the next time they chide you “Facebook is not the place”, you can remind them of this:

Nobody (or, almost no one) reads a dense non-fiction book to completion. They skip around or don’t finish it.
Fewer people are reading lengthy articles on the internet of any kind.
Fewer people are reading at all.
When people are “reading” they’re usually scrolling and capturing quick, short bits of information in a hurry.

The next thing you can mention is the EVIDENCE STRONGLY SUGGESTS that people spend LOTS of time hovering over and READING comments from various Facebook posters/accounts, especially if the posts are intriguing, controversial or even just slightly provocative.

I’m not talking about near nudity or explicit posts that generate the SAME kind of expected commentary. I’m referring to written posts that nudge people to read and then respond with their own intellectual take or perhaps push back with a logical and fact based retort. People are often considering all the other comments before posting their own. They don’t want to sound like they’re just repeating the same thing but have taken the time to think about the various comments and have arrived at a slightly nuanced angle. In other words, they END UP SPENDING MORE TIME on that post with lots of comments.

People are naturally curious. People also don’t always have the time to plow through a dense book that may be regarded as controversial. But somehow Facebook analytics and all the research we have until now suggests that people DO spend quite a bit of time in comment sections. If they’re not actively responding, their passively reading. And posts that make a person think for a moment will always generate more engagement, more time spent on that post.

This nonsense BS that FACEBOOK IS NOT THE PLACE TO POST SOME IDEA is NOT backed by evidence or what people are ACTUALLY engaged by or act upon. By far, Facebook is the place because people are more likely to be actively scrolling through Facebook than to be flipping through the pages of book–even if the book is controversial or engaging.

We need to rethink the common phrase “Facebook is not the place”. If you’re a digital creator, Facebook is most certainly the place. Of course you can lose followers but your reach directly expands for potential new followers or friends. Also, the algorithm constantly takes notes. It sees beyond quick likes where people scroll past rapidly vs. people hovering and reading and actually being fully immersed in a post or a string up comments below the post–even if they don’t click “like”.

I recently discovered that length of time spent is a STRONGER INDICATOR of reach and engagement than likes. Someone won’t like your post but they’ll hover over it and spend their precious time on it anonymously. Always remember that. The algorithm knows.

So if you have any interest in success measures like MAKING MONEY $$$$$$ or building a FOLLOWING in the digital sphere, you’ll need to rethink these overused expressions that really don’t have any bearing on reality.

THE 300 PEOPLE YOU INTERACT WITH IS ONLY 0.00000375 of 8.2 BILLION PEOPLE/GLOBAL POPULATION

You probably have more options than you realize. You probably have more reach. With the modern digital landscape, you can be influential because your ability to expand, grow and be recognized by a larger number of people is so much more ample. Meanwhile, your everyday life experience may be limited by the number of people you encounter and form both shallow and profound relationships with.

Dunbar’s number suggests that most people interact with and form stable relationships with 150 to 300 people in their life (and that’s a generous range!). The problem with these 150 to 300 people that we mostly see and interact with is that they provide a very limited “small pond” effect to our brains. This is a cognitive bias.

Thus, in reality, we interact with a VERY SMALL FRACTION of the global population. It’s impossible for our brains to internalize the vastness, the scale of it all. Instead, we rely on our limited understanding to gauge the world–especially OURSELVES IN THIS WORLD. Our thoughts regarding our opportunities, chances and options are simultaneously shrunk down to size.

We start to judge ourselves based on the overall tenor and consensus of how these 0.00000375 people in the global population respond to us. We’re constantly worrying about our character and how it is being perceived, evaluated, from the metrics coming from that very small population we are working with. For example, if we get fired, a few times (or even many times!) we assume our experience of ourselves is representative of THE LARGER REALITY.

If we blow it on our blog–with our you tube channel—with our social media posts- or even with something like the kiosk that we run at our local Farmer’s Market–WE ASSUME THAT WE HAVE A FIXED AUDIENCE or FIXED CLIENTS/PATRONS. You do not.

If you’re like me, your blog will attract some people from Pakistan one day and people from Iceland another day. Audiences change. People grow out of what you have to say. People find newer, fresher, younger faces or maybe they remember you and come back. You still have a chance to grow and have influence and success if you manage to hook even just a few people. You have to make people remember you.

Back to what I was saying earlier, if most of those people “in your current circle” think a certain way, have very different personality traits than we do, or are super judgmental, you’ll start to regard yourself through the same lens. Perhaps these individuals don’t make any outright negative statements–only little ones that diminish you or make you feel “you don’t have what it takes”, “You’re incomplete” or “You’re not there yet”.

Because of our cognitive biases, we project the opinions of a HANDFUL of certain people onto an entire hypothetical “public”. If our boss or work mates show disappointment for our idea, we feel like EVERYONE is disappointed with it. If a particular social group show’s aversion or dissatisfaction for your choices, it can feel like your’re just a general loser.

Often, we inflate the long-term impact of a single mistake.

We start to think that that circle of people defines who we are. Or, that must be the way the world is. But maybe we have it wrong. Maybe we just have the wrong 150-300 people in our circle from the get-go. Maybe we’ve been dealt a bad hand of people from the start.

Maybe someone like Steve Jobs had a bunch of “the right” people around him at the right time. Without that specific concoction of people, maybe he would have never had the sustained inspiration to carve out a successful path and put his ideas out there.

Afterall, it’s easier to try new things and throw our ideas out there with the right kind of people surrounding us. It’s much harder when we feel fear of what kind of half-hearted commentary we’re going to receive or worse, someone who changes the subject to talk about “the weather” a “recent event” or something very mundane like something they noticed about a particular street, car, celebrity, place. It can feel dismissive and boring at the same time.

My go-to thought when I’m feeling like I’ve been handed the wrong surrounding of people:

There are 8 BILLION people on the planet. Considering that number, my reputation is not at stake as much as I think. Like me, you need to NOT let those 12 job-related encounters–or even 30–establish your baseline identity or character.

To reiterate, maybe the successful people in the world had the right 150- 300 at there disposal from the very beginning. They had people who were cheerful, positive, successful themselves, happy, open to new ideas–philosophically minded, dreamers and willing to keep working at it and trying etc. Those are the kind of collaborators you want. If you don’t have them now, you can change things up. You can use the vast numbers of people who navigate the internet as a potential wellspring to draw from.

These are trite, already known thoughts. But the point is you must constantly remind yourself that there are 8 Billion people to exploit.

Maybe you can’t change things up right now. But at least you can remember THE LAW OF LARGE NUMBERS. That is, despite the common mantra “It’s a small world after all”. It really isn’t. There are 8 BILLION PEOPLE to exhaust your resources, time, attention and talents. There isn’t enough time in your life to remotely scratch the surface or all that’s out there. “The tip of the iceberg” platitude doesn’t even BEGIN to convey how FEW PEOPLE YOU’VE really interacted with or even more, formed a meaningful connection with or could have an impact on.

Don’t let those 5 people at your company/work determine who you are. Even if you’ve ruined your reputation at an entire company, remember there are literally millions of companies globally that you could reach out to or that may find your skills or personality admirable. BEEN IN PRISON? Guess what? If you’re out, there are TONS OF POTENTIAL opportunities if you’ve truly committed to a crime-free life and you have a willful determination to make something of yourself. There are literally thousands of countries where you could stake out your next project or business pursuit.

Remember the doctor who killed Michael Jackson? Guess what? In 2023 he successfully opened his own medical institute in San Juan and also in Trinidad and Tobago. He is back to not only being a successful doctor, but developing thriving clinics.

The odds are in your favor because the global population is enormous. And don’t let me get started with your ability to use AI and use it to carve out even more bifurcations that lead to EVEN MORE OPPORTUNITIES. Imagine the global population surging with robots? That’s even more “people” to work with.

There are so many mistakes you can make with different people and yet still billions of more people to “try it out on”. And, if you were making some sort of cardinal, egregious mistake, that mistake will eventually be corrected or modified after so many iterations and interactions with different people. You just have to keep reaching out to more people.

To conclude, remember that your REPUTATION isn’t a single, monolithic thing. It’s really just a bunch of perceptions held by different people in different contexts. A gaffe in one area may be unknown or irrelevant to other people who are not in your direct circle. Most people–even that small group of 150 to 300 that you might engage with yearly–are too busy to care about your mistakes for too long because they have their own lives to dwell on and their own mistakes.There will always be TONS of people on the globe for you to work with and have an impact on.

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