Tag: personal-development

CULTIVATING CREATIVITY WITH THINKING

CULTIVATING CREATIVITY WITH THINKING

The problem with creativity is that it requires effort. You must wrestle with an idea enough to want to see it “produced”.

I’ve always admired creative individuals and the act of creativity itself. But I know it requires that the mind burn and churn out ideas.  And many of these ideas won’t work. Many are impractical.

This process is expensive from a mental perspective. One must go down the creative path and to think those first thoughts…. to ask those first questions…. and then bump their brains against many ideas that are ALREADY OUT THERE, that already exist. Now you must find a unique path in this swirl of chaos.

I think the problem with creativity is that we think this is a state where only the most gifted or innately talented or privileged can enter. The truth is that the act of creativity requires a long, almost exhausting trail of trials and efforts before any product is invented, masterpiece is painted, or exotic piece of furniture is crafted…before any Olympian wins a gold medal.

Remember these are efforts of the mind that one is literally bringing out into tangible reality. It is a mistake of our push-button “everything this instant” culture to think that the artifacts of creativity are also push-of-the -button.

A quilt, a symphony or a successful home goods operation like Anthropolpogie were made by individuals who were and are truly moved and inspired by the act of creating…THE PROCESS of making.

 It’s the hundreds upon hundreds of incremental steps that are neglected by ALL outside spectators. All The risks and the monotonous efforts, all the trials and embarrassments, all the “looking foolish” or “looking like a show off” or the mind-numbingly boring experiences are felt in FULL FORCE by the individual who tries to make the creative effort.

The 2026 Olympics are almost here and I’m reminded of the 1990’s and early 2000’s.To become one of the world’s top Figure skaters and Olympians, Michelle Kwan began skating at age 5. At age 8, she started waking up at 4:00 AM and heading to the rink at 5:00 to skate for 2 hours before heading to a full day of elementary school. After school she was back at the rink for two more hours of practice. The amount of effort was insane, yet most of us just think of her as immensely talented.

One of the biggest thoughts that I find sabotaging my own efforts is the idea that “Hey, all of this creative effort may go in vain”. The consideration that all these efforts might not be the result of anything majestic or lasting or even anything briefly captivating.

 As Quest Protein Bar billionaire Tom Bilyeu (who grew up in a lower middle-class home) says “The struggle is guaranteed but the success is not”. And that’s the nature of the game.

By putting out efforts you’re investing not so much in the lottery but in the stock market. The stock market is a more reliable means to wealth acquisition, yet still risky. You can wait to be lucky and “in shape” or you can start making incremental moves now. And, when I say incremental, I mean small moves in your thinking. Just your thoughts will do for now. Training your thoughts to keep going towards your goals is often the first best form of training.

Say to yourself something like this, “I know I’m imperfect, but I have achieved X goal in the past”. Reflect on the little accomplishments you have completed by yourself through your own efforts.

The next thing you must do is try to notice any slightly negative thoughts you have about yourself. You will notice how constantly an effortlessly it is to think badly about yourself. The steady drip, drip, drip of negativity about yourself OR YOUR PAST or your current lack of success isn’t helpful towards what you want to achieve.

If you can effortlessly think negatively about yourself, think about changing that mindset to think effortlessly positively about yourself. True, both scenarios may be slightly delusional…but I think you can guess which thought is more helpful than the other. 

Training your continual act of thinking and imagination will be the most important step you can take at the beginning of this creative process.


 

NEGATIVE GROCERY STORE ENCOUNTERS: POWER IN THE EMOTIONAL MOMENT

NEGATIVE GROCERY STORE ENCOUNTERS: POWER IN THE EMOTIONAL MOMENT

A very quick yet (hopefully) pithy blog post today. I don’t expect anyone to read it. I do like to purge here on my blog and scribble out my thoughts to various interactions. In life, people will cause you the most pain. Hands down. There is nothing that will instigate more problems or conjure more negative self-talk than other people. Rarely do you wake up and simply decide to think negatively about yourself. Usually, it’s a frustrating encounter with another human being that sets off a cascade of negative self-talk and rumination.

It’s other people’s expressions, reactions and mannerisms that bring you to this psychological state. You may be minding your own business or thinking your own thoughts, yet someone acts a certain way and throws you off. Maybe they exhibit an attitude that you feel is unfair to your current situation. I know, I know, we hear it all the time “you are responsible for your own feelings”. This said, it’s almost always another person who has done the initiating or acted unreasonably considering the circumstances.

I had the experience of someone’s irritation, contempt and derision in Target yesterday. Perhaps it was because I was in Target and not in Walmart (where all the humble people abide). I can’t put my finger on it but these kinds of encounters never arrive when we’re at Walmart.

My children were blocking an aisle, as usual. My back was turned away from the approaching customer, her husband and (one) child. Once I realized the obstacle we had created for her, I immediately said “I’m so sorry!” and we speedily moved out of their path. All she could do was glare with derision and push past us with contempt. There was not a pinch of grace or kindness coming from her. We had stolen a few seconds of her life and for that she was outraged.

If the tables had been turned, I knew I would never respond like that. I couldn’t coax an attitude like that if I tried. In fact, I typically would pivot to another aisle with my cart or maneuver around. I figure out a way and I don’t force my way when there is a hiccup. I would rather put myself out than put someone else out.

I found myself deeply engrossed in the moment. As if that moment, with that look I momentarily caught from her, was stuck frozen in my mind. I could feel myself plunge into myself. I took in the emotional pain and didn’t shy from the feeling.

The feeling of being rejected and embarrassed came over me fully. I allowed it to. I felt worthless and rejected again. Yet I didn’t push past this emotion the way I usually do. I usually run from feelings of discouragement, embarrassment and dejection. This time I allowed it to sink it so that I could feel the full thrust of it. And you know what? It wasn’t as bad as I envisioned it to be. It was less painful just fully being immersed in my own blunder, my own ineptitude, my own lack of skill whilst navigating the perils of target with my 3 young children.

The key takeaway here is that there is always power in those moments of intense displeasure and embarrassment. Those are the instances where you can fully pull back—fully retract into a sense of mindfulness. And mindfulness is something we all need to get back into more often. In fact, we need frequent reminders to become mindful. We hear about the technique of mindfulness constantly, yet we forget about it. I’m mindless most of my days. We need everyday reminders! I need everyday reminders!

As I start out the new year with New Year’s resolutions, I will be using any negative or embarrassing occasion to conjure up mindfulness. Mindfulness is the antidote for any fleeting pain or trial. Since everything passes by so quickly anyways, there’s no reason to sit in the suffering. All you need to do is look at it, head on and then it disappears. Time goes on and that particular instance is FAR behind you. There is a world out there with plenty more interesting people and abundant opportunities.