Exercise NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS

It’s January and New Years Resolutions are upon us.

How can I be more fit? How can I become a better painter, writer or seamstress? How can I FINALLY figure out an avenue to make some side CASH? How can I improve my current career? How can l learn to be more thankful and reflective in every present moment? How can I find absolutely every possible way to squeeze out more creativity in every moment? How can I really, really, really learn to waste less time even though I’m already quite frugal with my time as it is?

These are all questions that are slamming into minds right now. We all want to improve. Everyone tends to have the same problems–not enough time, lots of interests and definitely a passion to use every single bit of their potential.

But here’s something you need to get rid of–especially as you commit to getting rid of the bad chemicals in your food–you must get rid of discouragement and depression. You have one brief life. It makes ZERO sense to spend time not feeling mentally or physically at your peak. You have this one opportunity (as we currently understand) to experience your particular consciousness. So why be bothered by feelings of listlessness or someone else’s little reaction to you?

I firmly believe we can craft peak levels of performance much more frequently than we realize. Even just writing these words I feel myself getting jazzed up.

Now, if you know of ways that certifiably increase your performance and an upbeat mental approach to issues, you can implement these into your moments.

I woke up sluggishly at 5:50am this morning. No, it wasn’t an all-star kind of morning. Everything felt pointless. Repetitive. And to use a cliche, just going through the motions. Then, at 6:50 am I decided to embark upon intense cardiovascular exercise on our exercise bike. After 15 minutes I felt back to normal. The sluggish feeling had all but dissipated. And this was all because of the exercise. Here I was doing something I didn’t want to do—and EVEN MORE IMPORTANTLY, doing something at a TIME I DIDN”T WANT TO DO IT. I didn’t put it off like I wanted to. I just went ahead and did it.

The best way to think of exercise (for me at least) is refreshment or a rinse. The mind is being refreshed by the neurotransmitters being produced from the exercise/movements. Neurotransmitters like dopamine, norepinephrine and serotonin are showered over your brain. These will help get you into the mental state that you need for the day. They assist with clarity. They will improve your mood and motivation. Also, higher levels of oxygen are reaching various brain tissues.

My favorite thing about exercise is that it very likely produces neuroplasticity. Most studies are indicating the involvement of exercise on brain growth. Who knows what we will find out about exercise over the next 50 years?

So, if there is one thing I will commit to this year it will be exercise. I will make movement and fitness my goal. I really hope this main goal will then trickle to other areas of my life. I can only hope.

NEGATIVE GROCERY STORE ENCOUNTERS: POWER IN THE EMOTIONAL MOMENT

A very quick yet (hopefully) pithy blog post today. I don’t expect anyone to read it. I do like to purge here on my blog and scribble out my thoughts to various interactions. In life, people will cause you the most pain. Hands down. There is nothing that will instigate more problems or conjure more negative self-talk than other people. Rarely do you wake up and simply decide to think negatively about yourself. Usually, it’s a frustrating encounter with another human being that sets off a cascade of negative self-talk and rumination.

It’s other people’s expressions, reactions and mannerisms that bring you to this psychological state. You may be minding your own business or thinking your own thoughts, yet someone acts a certain way and throws you off. Maybe they exhibit an attitude that you feel is unfair to your current situation. I know, I know, we hear it all the time “you are responsible for your own feelings”. This said, it’s almost always another person who has done the initiating or acted unreasonably considering the circumstances.

I had the experience of someone’s irritation, contempt and derision in Target yesterday. Perhaps it was because I was in Target and not in Walmart (where all the humble people abide). I can’t put my finger on it but these kinds of encounters never arrive when we’re at Walmart.

My children were blocking an aisle, as usual. My back was turned away from the approaching customer, her husband and (one) child. Once I realized the obstacle we had created for her, I immediately said “I’m so sorry!” and we speedily moved out of their path. All she could do was glare with derision and push past us with contempt. There was not a pinch of grace or kindness coming from her. We had stolen a few seconds of her life and for that she was outraged.

If the tables had been turned, I knew I would never respond like that. I couldn’t coax an attitude like that if I tried. In fact, I typically would pivot to another aisle with my cart or maneuver around. I figure out a way and I don’t force my way when there is a hiccup. I would rather put myself out than put someone else out.

I found myself deeply engrossed in the moment. As if that moment, with that look I momentarily caught from her, was stuck frozen in my mind. I could feel myself plunge into myself. I took in the emotional pain and didn’t shy from the feeling.

The feeling of being rejected and embarrassed came over me fully. I allowed it to. I felt worthless and rejected again. Yet I didn’t push past this emotion the way I usually do. I usually run from feelings of discouragement, embarrassment and dejection. This time I allowed it to sink it so that I could feel the full thrust of it. And you know what? It wasn’t as bad as I envisioned it to be. It was less painful just fully being immersed in my own blunder, my own ineptitude, my own lack of skill whilst navigating the perils of target with my 3 young children.

The key takeaway here is that there is always power in those moments of intense displeasure and embarrassment. Those are the instances where you can fully pull back—fully retract into a sense of mindfulness. And mindfulness is something we all need to get back into more often. In fact, we need frequent reminders to become mindful. We hear about the technique of mindfulness constantly, yet we forget about it. I’m mindless most of my days. We need everyday reminders! I need everyday reminders!

As I start out the new year with New Year’s resolutions, I will be using any negative or embarrassing occasion to conjure up mindfulness. Mindfulness is the antidote for any fleeting pain or trial. Since everything passes by so quickly anyways, there’s no reason to sit in the suffering. All you need to do is look at it, head on and then it disappears. Time goes on and that particular instance is FAR behind you. There is a world out there with plenty more interesting people and abundant opportunities.

“Good Little Decision” Journaling

Every act of self-discipline puts you on a journey to success and mental balance. I truly believe that just GRABBING my moments and making even just a few, very decisive moves will catapult me into a truly new dimension–a new reality of health and wellness.

Here is a recent example: Last night I decided not to eat a bowl of ice cream that I had planned to eat. I made my son a bowl of ice cream and was almost ready to make one for myself. At that CRITICAL MOMENT, I had a thought, a reflection, a flash of mindfulness. I thought, “You know, I’m only going to eat this bowl of ice cream for the taste–not because I’m famished, not because I’m even bored, not because it has some health denseness to it…but solely because I want a jolt of dopamine.

I’m not quite sure how I got through that impulse and made it to the other side. Truly, it was one of the few I’ve made. I lead a moderately healthy lifestyle but always give in for the “taste”. This time I made a choice–a deferral of gratification. I realize I need to make more of these little decisions on a moment-to-moment basis. Even here, I stopped for a few minutes to write and journal. It’s injecting the good decisions in your day–throughout your day–that really does the trick.

I think I’m going to make myself a journal where I start to write down good little decisions I make on a daily basis. Any act that fortifies my brain or my overall health should be written down and remembered. I need to write these moments down! As I develop my track record for good decisions, I will increase the level of confidence and positivity I have for myself. This will keep the momentum going for the times that I do break down and make awful health decisions. I have to start seeing myself as someone who can make better decisions. Afterall, I have done a few so I can do more, right? That’s the state of mind that you need to be in.

Sure, I may have had cookies for breakfast but how about exercising now, VIGOROUSLY? How about not checking my phone? How about writing a blog post? How about trying to force myself to stay positive for just a little while longer? How about channeling creativity instead of scrolling?

All of these little decisions add up!

MOMS ARE THE MOST OVERWHELMED, BUSIEST PEOPLE ON THE PLANET

Moms are the busiest, most overwhelmed people on the planet. I don’t think I can emphasize this enough. It can’t be said more. Today I want to take a chance to fully embrace and support all the moms out there!

Back in the days before I had children, I heard a story about a mom who melted the bottom of her laptop. She inadvertently placed her laptop on the top of a (previously) hot stove. I couldn’t fathom how someone could do such a thing. How careless!

Years later after having 3 little children, I recall this story often. I now KNOW, with CERTAINTY how likely this could happen if you’re a mom. I have days where my laptop is sitting on a counter with a mountain of clutter, kids are shouting orders at me in slavedriver fashion. I’m dashing around the kitchen trying to get someone milk or water or clean up spilled milk that is now being tracked through the hall. Two of the kids are screaming and one is in full-scale tantrum mode. I’m juggling my children’s feeding and drinking requests while I’m trying to check on kids’ assignments/grades on their education portal, paying bills, reading the recipe for dinner or just trying to keep my mind sharp with a podcast in the background. I’ve got a full bladder, and a crayon stuck to the bottom of my foot.

In such frantic chaos, I can see how easy it would be to accidentally shove a laptop through the mountain of counter clutter onto a cooling stovetop. Moms are juggling too many things. We’re doing about 5 things AT ALL TIMES. WE’RE STILL BEHIND. I see people leisurely sitting around scrolling very inane social media posts or tik tok videos. I’ve never actually been on Tik Tok. Not once. I can’t imagine the amount of productivity and time being wasted daily on these platforms. I see the loss of human potential.

As moms, we’re told we can’t complain because “we chose to have kids”. Meanwhile, our friends who are working a job they dislike complain about it non-stop but we don’t say “You can quit your job and find another one.” We listen with an attentive ear. We empathize and realize how hard it must be to work full time in a semi high-paying career, being mentally challenged and then come home to an empty house without screaming children and non-stop messes where one could then pursue various passions and hobbies. Life must be so terrible and depressing.

We realize how tough it must be to not have big gaps in our career and resumes. Don’t we all want big career/job gaps on our resumes? Isn’t that an advantage these days? Additionally, it must be hard to fully engage one’s brain and be challenged by a cutting-edge career that has the potential to increase one’s monetary success, opportunities and social clout. Nobody wants that! How tough it must be for career women!

All the sarcasm and whining aside, the studies reveal that MORE AND MORE women are pursuing education and careers instead of child-rearing. Women with children are also pursuing careers and education. Life is stressful for everyone.

But………. women with several small children have it much harder. Sorry. I had to say it. I’ve done it both ways and I know that making money or pursuing education are quite fun in comparison to managing repetitive disasters all day whilst listening to an orchestra of screams and shouts. And yes, I know this period only lasts a little while and then it’s over. But I still think the burden is almost unforgiveable. And yes, I complain about it because I know my mom, my grandmothers and my aunts never did. They weren’t allowed to complain.

To end this rant, I want to salute all women with multiple children juggling so many tasks all at once! Whether you’re a single mom working or not, a working mom or a stay-at-home Mom. The survival of the HUMAN SPECIES (before AI and AGI takes over) LITERALLY DEPENDS ON YOU MOMS!

The world population is sharply declining! People are less likely to have children or have a desire for children. With advances in AI technology, even fewer children will be born. Perhaps, we humans will morph into part-robots with fewer social needs because AI and AGI will fulfill those needs. We won’t need to “Make more humans” because technology will give rise to conscious beings that will serve as the next tier of evolution as we know it. Theoretical speculation, but fun to consider!

So just remember, being a mom is very important for the human species. It’s not very fun a lot of the time but it is the feature that has brought humanity to where it is right now. Civilization needed a long line of mothers to get to where we are. We needed a surplus of humans with skills and interests that would usher in scientific innovation and the chance to fulfill our potential as humans. Thank goodness for all the moms in history who gave birth to all the incredible brains out there! We are discovering solutions to some of the world’s most complex problems!

STOP WASTING TIME SCROLLING

You aren’t spending very much time on blogs or reading anymore, are you? You are perhaps in some of the most dreadful moments of your life. You’re not finding your own life. You’re like an automated machine sucked into LONG PERIODS OF SCROLLING. There are so many platforms that encourage just another quick glance and so on and so forth. This is not a happy place for the mind.

The mind wants to peace and rest. It wants reflection. It doesn’t want incessant interruption from short bites of information. It wants your own thoughts to bubble up from the subconscious caverns of the brain and form deep and complex relationships and understandings. With other people CONSTANTLY IN YOUR FACE and importing their own thoughts into the shrine of your own mind–think reels, short videos, memes, or any extremely sliced and diced ultra refined content (as I like to think of it) — there’s very little reserved time and space for self-reflection.

Even worse, it’s tough to discover your own passion for creativity and your zest for life because so much of your time is invested in other people’s interests and pursuits--namely, their hobbies or career of making short reels that have to do WITH THEM and THEIR LIVES and THEIR HOBBIES or even, THEIR SENSE OF HUMOR. What about YOU? You’re just the mindless spectator helping them achieve their goals.

Much of our diet is ultra processed refined food. At some point factories and companies realized that we tend to prefer anything easy, quickly tasty and satisfying. In the same way, our digital diet for our minds is becoming plagued by ultra processed, short-form media like reels and memes or even facebook or Instagram stories. These short form pieces of content almost always make us think “Wow, I wasted my time on that?”. Very rarely are we thinking, “Wow, that was super insightful, and I’ll be using that technique today!”

Make no mistake, the reason why people make these pieces of content are for increased viewership and gaining more followers. The more massive one’s audience, the more money they can make with online content. The bigger they get, the more marketer’s will see them and make them affiliates with their company. Ultimately, they can push out products for big companies and generate revenue from this strategy. THEY ABSOLUTELY NEED YOUR CONTINUED VIEWERSHIP AND ATTENTION. Without you, without the masses doing this, these creators would have very little incentive to keep making such inane (often thoughtless) barely funny content.

Yes, sometimes we accumulate novel ideas from reels and stories. We gain fleeting moments away from boredom. But…. we lose way too much time compared to the insights that we gain.

I know this is old, but my suggestion is, why not adopt a DIGITAL FAST of sorts? Spend some time being alone with your own thoughts–without the internet or a screen. Try to force yourself to read even part of a book. Write 2 paragraphs about something you’re thinking about. Meditate alone and quietly. Make some tea and commit to being mindful throughout the entire process. Don’t ride on someone else’s thinking. Ride on your own thinking. And again, if you must ride on someone else’s thinking, make it come from a LONG FORM SOURCE or a written source. Books are great for this.

If you have to spend time on social media platforms spend it on YOUTUBE: LISTENING TO INTERVIEW PODCASTS that are LONG and that probe into the nature of thought and reality or that dedicate time for self-help and health, think Alex O’Connor, Tom Bilyeu, Lex Fridman, Ed Mylett, Rich Roll, Sam Harris, Stephen Bartlett–Diary of a CEO, Dan Koe, Deep Dive with Ali Abdaal, Lewis Howes, Dr. Rangan Chatterjee, Andrew Huberman, Andre Duqum, Chris Williamson–just to name a few. I love listening to discussions between two different minds and I love how the above podcasters are willing to pose hard, thought-provoking questions that get my brain engaged. It’s amazing how much better I feel when/after listening to these individuals. I have more stamina for harder, more ambiguous, difficult content and I can listen while I’m doing housework or driving.

These are just some ideas. I will not demonize modern society and technology. As with everything, there are tradeoffs. There are goods and bads that come with all of this ultra processed media. I tend to see more bads than goods because as we know, time is the most valuable resource.

FINDING CREATIVITY

Having everything done on my to-do list and my feet resting flat on the floor is becoming the trick to ushering in the expansion of my creativity. I’m whittling stuff off my to-do list. I’m simultaneously realizing I don’t need to keep taking expensive college courses that interfere with my life. I’m focusing more on my children and anything that truly piques my interest.

Nursing school was fine. I did it! I got my RN. Truthfully, nursing isn’t something I think I can be good at as a profession. There’s just too many demands at the same time. You’re never done. People fall and you have to catch their bodies. I’ve worked with nurses who are still undergoing physical therapy themselves due to catching falling patients. Working in a nursing home taught me that. I only did it because my Grandmother chided me for pursuing an Esthetician license saying “Do something real! Do something that’s actually useful!” So, I took on nursing. Now, I have both a nursing (RN) degree and an Esthetician license. Since graduating in December of 2014, I’ve only had a couple nursing jobs and a few volunteering positions.

I’ve SLOWLY and recently released the grips my ego has over me. My ego seems to want more college education–to go further! My EGO wants me to forge a path ahead and grab ambition and accomplishment and knowledge and squeeze their products into a pitcher as one squeezes lemons for the delicious result of lemonade. Like everyone else, I seek the same applause from effortful pursuits. There is another desire I’m finding… to see creativity unfold.

But…I’m realizing if it’s not for the sake of creativity itself, it is just a vain attempt to build a greater self-empire. The ego wants to behold itself and showcase all of what it’s done.

No longer. I want to exemplify creativity and seek creative pursuits in all their forms for the sake of creativity itself. Not for money, or recognition or fleeting applause and approval but simply for learning and recreation. Creativity is fun. It satisfies itself. It needs nothing more.

Creativity is about finding the interconnectedness between two things. It asks, how can we look at something from a BIG picture or a SMALL picture? Creativity is a curious endeavor and requires that we look at things through various angles. FOR INSTANCE, LAST NIGHT I HAD A SUDDEN EUREKA MOMENT. A volcano is like an acne pimple or lesion. There is swelling, inflammation and heat that starts to roil beneath the surface. The volcano lifts the surrounding terrain in a cone shaped form as does the acne pimple on the skin. Both the pimple and volcano explode out onto surfaces. For the pimple it is the skin and for the volcano it is the surrounding terrain. The damage done below the surface of the skin can cause an acne scar in the formation of a crater as the skin starts to settle. In the same way, as the volcano settles, the terrain can form a caldera or crater.

This is how creativity can start emerging. In the example above I started to look at two things as though they may be connected. When you do this you start to recognize intriguing relationships between disparate phenomena! And it just keeps going from here. It can get very exciting and addicting and you’ll start pursuing creativity for its own sake.

How can you find creativity in your life? What I’m realizing is that YOU NEED BLOCKS OF UNINTERRUPTED TIME. No tuned-out periods of phone scrolling, no children screaming in the distance and no interruptions from surrounding clutter. Clutter can be a huge distraction because it signals to the brain that you HAVE SOMETHING ELSE THAT NEEDS TO BE DONE. Even if you try, it’s still there, it’s visual phenomena. It’s saying, “shuffle your attention over here from time to time”. Getting rid of stuff and cleaning your workspace will have a dramatic effect on your ability to engage in deeper creativity and approach the psychological experience called “Flow”. I’ve had flow several times and it’s one of the better gifts of human experience.

Thus, you need time plus an environment to start making creativity happen. It’s hard to get started but once you start rolling you start going. It’s really just an openness to possibility. It’s seeing every moment in a novel way. It’s asking, can I reframe this moment to make it better? You can adjust a tilted picture frame by moving it ever so slightly. In the same way, you can adjust your current reality by tilting it a bit and making it appear more novel. Take a moment to realize you can notice different things and then you take a different approach. Try zooming out with your focus and then zooming way back in. It’s all this adjustment and provides new insight and perspectives.

Also, don’t forget the power of sleep! I’m always way more likely to both think creativity and have more motivation to be creative when I get adequate sleep. When I’m well-rested, I have better resilience for my own failures or when people reject me or give me the cold shoulder. I have higher tolerance for so much more! When pursuing creative ambitions, you really need lots of tolerance because it’s a struggle to get going with creative pursuits and a struggle to KEEP GOING. You can have all the ideas in the world but its easy to flounder and stop.

Sometimes you do need moments of blandness and boredom to eventually get to more profound levels of creativity. It’s like your brain needs the contrast. I find that the most scintillating insights arrive when I’m doing very mundane tasks like moving about putting things away. My brain is slightly disengaged but yet there must be subconscious processes that are still occurring. I’ve discovered that very intense bursts of cardiovascular exercise seem to prepare me both mentally and physically for that calm that comes before the creative storm. I also feel good for exercising and exerting a form of self-discipline.

I’m eager to discover more synchronicities and possibilities with anything that I interact with. When you discover more and learn more you can see more connections that can lead to novel inventions, ideas or ways of doing things. I don’t have a formalized, set structure for discovering creativity but I’m deeply curious if perhaps there is a method that I will soon discover! I’m working on this!

ATTENTION AND SHORT FORM SOCIAL MEDIA THOUGHTS

I get so much joy and mental balance from avoiding social media. 20 years ago I loved how I would explore with my mind, how much longer I could endure being absorbed and immersed in a single activity. My mental faculties could withstand long hours reading or listening to the ideas of, say, Patricia Churchland vs. David Chalmers and their philosophical underpinnings. Now, reality seems to be diminished to short, very simplistic videos that we all happen to scroll by, very, very quickly as if to inhale as many of these in the shortest few seconds as possible.

Look around at any bus stop, coffee shop, check-out line or even a family sitting together at a restaurant. Are they reading blogs? Are they scouring long sections of text or lengthy news articles? NO. They are most-often in a mindless bout of scrolling. But it doesn’t stop there. Does it? It just keeps going and going. It doesn’t ever stop. Sometimes when they’re driving, they’ll take a moment or two to look at the road or their surroundings, but back to their phone they go. And humans keep clicking into their social media account throughout the day to imbibe more and more of these little useless trinkets of someone’s life. And there’s part of you that’s thinking either: Dang I’m wasting my life looking at your dull snippets of media, or, I wish I could be the one making engaging content and generating $$$ on it too!

Decades ago, so many of us would spend hours on Wikipedia or listening to long, dense lectures. While I still do this when I have the time, the incentive structure of modern society has changed. The hyper focused way of using the internet has passed…or maybe we’ve entered a new era.

Now, with the constant access of our phones and the onslaught of short-form social media content platforms, we are MENTALLY SCATTERED. We are all spending WAY TOO MUCH TIME on short-form internet content. This is the issue I want to address and keep on addressing here on my blog and even just to myself because I think that it’s going to be the Black Swan of our time. We may not realize it now but at some point, we will look back and see the stark changes to humanity and to the evolution of humanity itself.

If I were to sum up what’s happening it would be like this: We are all constantly “CHECKING”. It’s become an automatic behavior like breathing. There are so many possible options to scroll by and it’s like our brain doesn’t want to “get behind” or be “out of the loop”. So, we keep doing it. Or perhaps our brain just gets bored more easily. Every-day non-screen activities have become such drudgery to the mind. It’s not that we are afraid of being alone but that we need to be stimulated from the boredom. Our brain, like our body, wants escape and relaxation–not challenge, struggle or exercise. It’s wants any easy click and an easy find. We discover ourselves scrolling through short-form media content like videos or memes or very inane short posts.

As for me, I want to get back to attention–to being ABLE TO ATTEND. I want to pay attention for a long period of time. I want to be able to zoom into focus immediately on a long article and allow the complexity to pique my brain while I envision fresh perspectives that instigate action. I want to LISTEN TO (not watch) lengthy videos with novel discussion or interviews regarding the universe, AI, human intelligence, physics, philosophy, health and longevity, anti-aging, creativity, productivity, time management and anything to do with self-help. I am fascinated by all of these topics and want to keep exploring them and writing about them. I establish deeper learning and memory retrieval after writing what I read, research or delve into. In a way, humans are a lot like AI. The more we explore new data sets the more we develop a basic intuitive grasp of things. Then, we keep iterating until we kind of figure it out.

I still want to be online. But…. I want to utilize the internet and recent cutting edge AI technologies so that my own creativity can emerge. Creativity is just a novel assortment of various pieces or ideas that already exist. There is really so much potential out there! New technologies will have most prominence in the hands of those who use them to blend with their own creative outputs.

JUST START TAKING ACTION!

Lately, I’ve been learning about taking action. The best time to take action is always as soon as you can!

The recently rising entrepreneurial star on YouTube, Alex Hormozi who started from scratch and has made HUNDREDS OF MILLIONS OF DOLLARS by his early 30’s, is famous for saying, “The key to success is to reduce the time between when you have a thought and when you take action.”

Taking action and running from procrastination is the FIRST KEY TO SUCCESS. Do something and DO ANYTHING. If you just start, you’ll find a way. You’ll receive some feedback, and you’ll discover a different twist along your path. This is much better than “waiting for the right moment to take action.”. Remember you ONLY HAVE SO MUCH TIME. And then, it’s over. It’s better to start making the mistakes and failures now than waiting to make mistakes later.

While ice skating with my 6-year-old son yesterday, I couldn’t help but notice two distinct groups on the rink: cautious beginners sticking to basic forward skating and daring experts executing impressive leaps and spins. It’s as if everyone’s avoiding the middle ground between playing it safe and risking a face-plant!

It made me realize that sometimes we refuse to act because we don’t want to go through the embarrassment of the next risky step. We would rather “show off once we get there” but we hesitate to approach that middle ground of floundering—that middle ground of hard work and trial and error that exists between novice and Pro.

Taking action is easier for some things. Ever notice how easy it is to click on an Instagram, Facebook or other social media Icon on your phone and just start scrolling? It’s extremely easy and mindless to do this task. And if the statistics are valid, BILLIONS OF PEOPLE ON PLANET EARTH ARE ENGAGING IN THIS PASSIVE BEHAVIOR EACH DAY—throughout the day!

What if we started to think of other endeavors or tasks as just as easy and mindless?

What if we just opened a Word document on our computers and just started writing? What if we started brainstorming possible things that we wanted to learn?

What if we jumped on our exercise machines without “getting our workout gear on”? Even for just 5 minutes!

It’s intriguing to consider how effortlessly we engage in passive behaviors like scrolling through social media, yet we hesitate to apply the same level of ease and mindlessness to other endeavors. What if we approached writing, learning, or exercising with the same nonchalant attitude? By reframing our mindset and acknowledging that starting is often the hardest part, we can overcome the inertia of procrastination and propel ourselves towards our goals.

Let’s challenge ourselves to adopt the mentality of “just start.” Whether it’s opening a blank document, brainstorming ideas, or hopping on the exercise machine without overthinking it, taking that initial step is the catalyst for progress. Remember, time is finite, and it’s better to embrace mistakes and failures along the way than to wait for the elusive “perfect moment” that may never come. In the end, the journey of taking action is where growth and success truly unfold!

Top of Form

ANXIETY STACKING/ HOW TO USE IT!!!!

In the world of self-help, self-improvement and motivation we’re all familiar with the phrase “Habit Stacking” or “skill stacking’. “A recent idea that I thought of is “Anxiety Stacking”. This concept came to me the other day when I woke up feeling anxious again, for seemingly no reason. Why do I feel so anxious?

Anxiety always seems to be connected to other people. ALMOST ALWAYS. It’s someone who has unfollowed me or unfriended me on Facebook or Instagram. I feel the anxiety flood in. Maybe it’s a suggestion to “patch a hole in my coat” (as if I didn’t notice that!). It’s someone’s hesitation to be warm or friendly after I have been exuberant and kind with them. It’s someone’s dismissive or “calm down” response to me about an expressive thought that I’ve vocalized–especially when I made an intentional effort to not be dismissive to their thoughts. It’s a job or opportunity rejection. Or maybe it’s the feeling conjured up when someone else in my current niche of interest is producing incredible products. There’s the unmistakable twinge of envy that creeps in when a peer in my field is churning out remarkable work, leaving me feeling like the underdog.

I’m in a quest to tame my anxiety. Anxiety is a very uncomfortable state of being. I’ve realized that I’m often at war with it. Once my psyche is plunged into this state, it tries with might to get out! Sometimes I sit in this state for half a day. I fantasize about the moment that I “will no longer feel anxious”.

I’ve decided to turn this upside down! Instead of dream of the moment where I’m “no longer feeling anxious” I’m going to use my anxiety as a catalyst. I’m going to use these moments of angst to run towards EVEN MORE SITUATIONS and EVEN MORE PEOPLE who AROUSE MY ANXIETY.

But why? The reason is because this is the PERFECT TIME. I’m already in the throes of anxiety. This is the time to allow more of it…because, wait, can anxiety get worse than it already is? Not really. It’s going to feel just as painful and anxiety-riddling with one or two rejections as it is with about 10 or 20 rejections. Sure, lots of rejections slammed on you at once may take a toll on your overall self-esteem (in the moment) but more on that later…

When you feel anxious it’s better to do a bunch of different things that may stir your anxiety. These are things like: apply for a job (that you think you’ll get rejected from), apply for a volunteer position (that you don’t think you have a chance at), ask someone out who’s likely to reject you. Compose an email to that estranged long-lost Uncle of yours! Has a neighbor recently rebuffed you? Bravely approach them and start talking in a bright, cheerful, annoying voice as if you don’t notice their disdain for you. Remember! They’re going to die too. You have one life and now is the perfect time to take risks with your ego because, again, YOU’RE ALREADY FEELING ANXIOUS.

I’ve noticed that when I do this, when I zoom into uncomfortable situations, I end up forgetting (for at least part of the day) some of the other uncomfortable situations that I’ve just encountered. It’s like I’m stacking more anxiety-pervading moments onto the heap. My memory (and anxiety) can only handle and FOCUS on a couple of these at a time.

Now, why do this? Because when you place your eggs in many baskets, when you apply for that job, inquire about a volunteer position in your field of intrigue, ask out a potential date, or speak to someone who you think “doesn’t like you” you actually increase the likelihood that ONE OF THESE ACTIONS works out in the end.

Let’s reiterate! When you diversify your efforts—whether it’s applying for a job, seeking a volunteer opportunity in your field of interest, mustering the courage to ask someone out, or engaging with someone you perceive as indifferent to you—you significantly boost the chances that at least one of these endeavors will yield positive results. Success tends to favor those who cast a wide net.

By taking action and doing a bunch of uncomfortable things in your current “Already-Anxiety” state, you’re learning a trick and modify your behavior and use it for your own self-improvement.

Now you can see the positive angle on anxiety. Use this state to your advantage!

PICKING YOURSELF OUT OF THE DUMPSTER

I’ve concluded that a 20 minute cardio exercise session followed by stretches is perhaps the best strategy for picking myself up from the dumps.

After 20 minutes of fairly intense cardio you start to feel a soothing, warm calmness descend upon you. Exercising regularly like this will assist in achieving a variety of goals all at the same time!

While exercise isn’t a 100% guarantee, it will INCREASE YOUR CHANCES of being more creative, less moody. It will INCREASE YOUR CHANCES of sleeping better. It will pivot your mind away from negative thinking (at least temporarily). It will INCREASE YOUR CHANCES of having a better memory that day because of the increased blood flow to your brain.

Because exercising regularly INCREASES the likelihood of so many positive life experiences and emotions, it ends up diminishing the time…those moments you’re spending in unpleasant states of what I call “mental dreariness”. Exercising gives you a MUCH NEEDED BREAK from anxiety or dwelling on (seemingly) failed experiences or failed personal interactions.

Over the weeks, LESS TIME SPENT IN MENTAL DREARINESS OR DEPRESSION starts to ADD UP! You’re reworking your entire conscious configuration. Think about all the new inputs you’ll receive from more time spent in flow states and less time allowing your brain to wander into jealousy or resentment or comparison to others. It’s like compound interest for your brain. Over time, you’re changing into an improved person, both mentally and physically.

The problem with exercise is that it is often uncomfortable, monotonous and boring. But other than that, it’s a huge investment to your life and wellbeing. Start out for 5 minutes of intense cardio a day and start to add a minute or two. I started around 8 minutes per day and FINALLY got up to 15 (yes, after 2 years). Now I’m easily committed to 20 minutes a day of intense exercise.

Once you start seeing the incremental improvements, you’re hooked. You’ll even miss it on those sick days!

A Slice of My Trash, Travels and Tots

A Slice of My Travels and Baby Blog

Category: Uncategorized